8.1 VISITING A PATIENT
It is your duty to visit your Muslim brethren in time of illness. This will enhance and nourish the bond of Islam and the brotherhood among you. As a committed Muslim, do not undervalue the great reward from Allah. Imam Muslim reported that the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said: ‘A Muslim visiting ill brethren will continue to be in the Khurfa of paradise until he, or she comes back home. He was asked, ‘What is the khurfa of Paradise?’ He answered, ‘This means the harvest of paradise.’ Imam Ahmad and Ibn Hibban in his authentic book reported that the Messenger said: ‘A visitor walking to visit a patient will be wading in the mercy of Allah. When the visitor sits with the patient they will be immersed in mercy until his, or her return.’

8.2 PRAYING FOR THE SICK
It is very appropriate to say few prayers for the sick asking Allah (SWT) to bless them with recovery and help them through their sickness. Bukhari and Muslim reported that Aisha said ‘If someone fell sick the Prophet would pass his right hand over them while saying the following prayer ‘O the Lord of humans, take away the suffering, bring the recovery, no cure but your cure that leaves no ilness.’ In another hadith reported by Bukhari, Ibn Abbas said that the Prophet when vising a sick person would say: ‘Hold on, may Allah cleanse you.’

8.3 THE LENGTH OF THE VISIT
Certain etiquette will make your visit to an ill person a refreshing and morale boosting one. Your duty is to ease his or her pains, and to make him or her more conscious of the rewards they will gain in return for their suffering and endurance.

Make your visit brief. Sick persons may not withstand such long visits. The length of the visit should be not longer than the time between the two speeches of Friday. In this respect, it was said that the visit should be long enough to convey your greeting and wishes (Salam), to ask the sick how he or she is doing, to pray for recovery and to leave immediately after saying good-bye.

If you visit a patient say your greeting
And immediately you should say, ‘Good-bye’
The best visit is every third day The best stay is in the blink of an eye
Do not bother the patient with many questions
Two or three words will get you all along.

At the end of his book of Malkite Fiqh, Al-Kafi, Imam Ibn ‘Abdul Al-Barr said: ‘Whether you visit a healthy or an ill person, you ought to sit where you are told. Hosts know better how to ensure privacy in their home. Visiting an ill person is a confirmed Sunnah. The best visit is the shortest. The visitor sought not to sit too long with an ill person, unless they are close friends and the ill person enjoys their company.’

8.4 THE MANNERS OF VISITING A PATIENT
The visitor ought to wear clean clothes with a fresh scent in order to make the patient feel better both spiritually and physically. At the same time, it is improper to wear fancy clothes that are more appropriate for parties and festivities. Wearing a strong perfume may annoy the sick.

Visitors ought to keep their conversation light and avoid gloomy talk that might exacerbate the patient’s distress. Avoid conveying bad news such as a failing business, a death, or similar bad news. Also, visitors ought not to inquire about the details of illness unless the visitor is a specialized physician. Similarly, visitors should not recommend to a patient any food or medicine that might have helped them or someone else. Such recommendation might lead the ill person, out of ignorance or desperation, to try it, causing further complication or even death.

Do not criticize or object to the treatment by the physician in the presence of the ill person for it might cast doubt in the mind of the sick. If you are a specialized physician, you may want to discuss the case and its treatment privately with the doctor in charge.

8.5 How the Ill express their complaints
It is recommended that when asked about our condition, a sick person should start by thanking Allah and then proceed to list his complaints. This is to avoid the appearance of complaining of Allah’s will. This was the etiquette of the followers as reported by Al-Khatib Al-Baghdadi in his Tarikh Baghdad in the biography of Abdul Rahman Al-Tabib who was the physician of Imam Ahmad and Bishr Al-Hafi. Abdul Rahman said both Imam Ahmad and Bishr became sick and were treated at the same place. ‘When I visited Bishr, I asked how he felt, and with thanks to Allah first, he then proceeded saying I have this pain or that complaint. When I visited Imam Ahmad and asked how he felt, he would say ‘I feel all right.’ One day I told him, ‘your brother Bishr is also ill, but when I ask him of his conditions, he thanks Allah first, then tells me his condition. Imam Ahmad said, ‘Please ask him from where did he get this.’ I answered, ‘His presence makes me reluctant to ask.’ Imam Ahmad said, ‘Tell him your brother, Abo Abdillah asks from where did you get this.’ Abdul Rahman asked Bishr as told. Bishr said, ‘Abo Abdillah wants everything with authority. I heard this from Azhar who heard it from ibn Aoun who heard it from ibn Sireen; ‘If a person thanked Allah before complaining, it will not be a complaint but as if telling the acts of Allah. ‘ Abdul Rahman said, ‘I
told this to Imam Ahmad. After that, if asked how he felt, he would start by thanking Allah, and then describing his complaints.’

The answer of Bishr indicates that when asked about their health, the sick preferably should praise Allah first then explain their complaints. By this approach, it is not considered complaining against the acts of Allah.

from the book ISLAMIC MANNERS
By Shaykh Abdul-Fattaah Abu Ghuddah (RA)

“Diapers cost a lot,” said my friend, when we met on her visit to her home country five months after she had her first baby. She looked into my eyes, searching for acquiescence,”….right?” As our children lay playing around us, I nodded, and stopped myself in time from insensitively blurting out, “But this is just the beginning”. I knew how inappropriate that would sound to a new mother who was assessing the extra expenses related to her baby for the first time in her life. Understandably, she was going through the initial adjustment phase of becoming a new parent, and needed only encouragement from her experienced friends.

We all have our expenses: the bills, the monthly payments, and the extra expenditures that crop up out of nowhere, especially for those of us who have families to support, viz. parents and siblings, or spouses and children.

Shortly after we pass the two-decade milestone in our lives, we wake up to real life, and realize that it is not all eat, drink, and be merry. For some, this wakeup call comes much earlier due to straitened circumstances. For others, it might come a bit late – when they finally start shouldering more responsibility.

Either way, one inevitably realizes sooner or later in life that money is the life-blood we need to be able to keep bringing food to our tables, and that this money is earned through hard work. We should neither waste it on frivolities, nor should we withhold it from ourselves or others out of miserliness.

Additionally, we should never undermine the relationships we have with our families, because these bonds were created by Allah, and He records and rewards even the small, seemingly insignificant bits of good we do to them – even what we see as trivial, of the things we give them, that are included in their rights upon us.

Recently, I came across a hadith that really opened my eyes to how we should all look at our family-related expenses and liabilities. It also reminded me of the importance of one’s intention whilst doing mundane, everyday tasks that we really don’t view as acts of worship, such as buying one’s child a small toy, or going out for the weekly grocery run.

[أخرجه أحمد، والبخاري ، ومسلم]

It is narrated from Abu Mas’ud al-Badri [رضى الله عنه] that the Messenger of Allah [صلى الله عليه و سلم] said,

“Without a doubt, when a Muslim spends money on his family while considering (the action as worship), it is an act of charity”.

[Reported by Imams Ahmad, Bukhari and Muslim]

This short but profound narration gives us tremendous consolation: if we renew and rectify our intentions regarding spending on our family, to do so for the sake of Allah as an act of sadaqah (charity), Allah will count these expenditures as such, insha’ Allah.

The key words in the hadith are وَهُوَ يَحْتَسِبُهَا - meaning that the spender, whilst spending on his or her family should, in his heart, intend or consider that spending as a sadaqah. The words احتَسَبَ يَحْتَسِبُ اِحْتِسَابٌ imply to reckon something, to seek reward from Allah for something, to count something as eligible for  reward. In a verse of Surah at-Talaq, Allah mentions:

وَيَرْزُقْهُ مِنْ حَيْثُ لَا يَحْتَسِبُ

“And He (Allah) will provide for him (the believer) from where he does not expect/reckon; (from whence does not occur to his mind).” [65:3]

In the above verse, the same word is used to imply that the believer doesn’t “reckon” from where Allah will provide for him.

Therefore, we can conclude from the above hadith that we should “count” or “reckon” our spending (نفقة) on our families (اهل) as charity (صدقة) when we spend on them in any way, whether big or small.

We find ourselves inundated by extra expenses during some months of the year. This is especially so around vacation season, with the costly Islamic summer camp, the plane tickets required for importing parent(s) for the summer, or the shiny new workbooks to keep the children constructively occupied. We dread receiving the doctor’s bill and having to fill costly medicine prescription, upon taking a sick dependent to the doctor’s clinic. And we anticipate with some foreboding, magnanimous four-figure bills, as our children grow older and prepare for college.

Graduation parties, Eid dinners, transatlantic flights to reinstate biological ties and bring smiles across elderly faces. School fees, fuel and rent charges, furniture and electronics costs. Clothes and accessories, a mini van, a bigger home for growing broods. The list is endless. Sometimes, when we see no end to the costs in sight, yet almost always come face-to-face with the rock-bottom of our monthly/weekly budget, we do tend to get a bit down in the dumps.  That is the time when we need positive reminders that our spending, depending on our intention, will be counted as a charity, even through we’ve seen it as an “expense”.

There is absolutely no way that we can guarantee provisions for the ones whom Allah has brought into this world, as He is the Provider. However, He has entrusted us with fulfilling our responsibilities towards them, and these duties are their rights upon us.

We should keep reminding ourselves of the intention behind each and every thing we do. This will enable us to renew this intention, and hence ensure that our book of deeds records all our actions, even those that appear to the world as “expenses” or “liabilities”, as deeds truly done to please our Creator (with full اِحْتِسَاب).

The Pious Barber Abu Ja’far al-Hadad relates, “During a stay in Makkah my hair had grown long but I could not afford to cut it. I went to a barber who seemed to be a good man and asked him to cut my hair for the sake of Allah. The barber glanced at my messy hair and invited me forward. He trimmed away the locks up to the ears.

Once he had finished he reached and handed over some dirhams. He said, “Take it. You’ll need it”. I was reluctant but he insisted. I took it on the condition of returning the whole amount at the first opportunity. I thanked him and left.

Later I met a friend outside the Haramain. He informed me that a friend of mine from Basra had left this bag containing 300 dirhams for me. I took the bag and gave it to the barber. The barber said, “Oh Shaykh, do you not have any shame? You told me to cut your hair for the sake of Allah and now you want me to take the charge. Take the bag and may Allah forgive you.”

Today Hijab Style brings you a quick interview with Katrin Meyer, founder of the Moroccan-based hijab company Modiste.

Jana: Tell us a little about yourself?

Katrin: Salaam alaikum! I’m a revert to Islam, German, living and working at the gateway between East and West. Upon completing my studies of Islam in 2001 I worked long-time as assistant of an Arab ambassador in Berlin. From this exposed position I witnessed over the last decade the increasingly negative image of Islam in the West, marked by associations such as aggressiveness, oppression of women and backwardness.

This discrepancy between Islam’s timeless beauty and truth and its contrary outside perception has since been my great concern because it has far-reaching consequences: It prevents Muslims living in Western societies from an equitable participation in the social and political life.

Jana: What’s the idea and ethos behind Modiste?

Katrin: The negative image of Islam doesn’t have anything to do with its essence. Rather with some of its outer forms of appearance and wrong conclusions of those who don’t know better. In order to rectify this distorted picture, it’s certainly not the message that has to be changed, but rather the way of communicating it. Fashion is unique in the sense that it is a subtle medium of communication with an immediate effect.

Modiste hijabs are designed to reflect the universality of a divine religion. Islam by its very nature is vital and progressive and not necessarily Oriental. The misconceptions about Islam – oppression of women, lack of innovation – are actually a reflection of the current state of Oriental social structures. Our major goal is to empower Muslim sisters through a style of clothing that is less charged with connotations.

At the same time we want to simplify hijabi life style. All our hijabs are simply pulled over the head, no need to wrap, pin or knot. Maybe it is because of my European background, but I’ve never got used to the traditional headscarf. It might look good if you’re skillful, but it’s not practical. We would like to offer an alternative to those, who feel the same.

By Maulana Manzoor Nu‘maani
Abu Hurayrah radhiyallahu anhu relates that the Apostle of Allah sallallahu alayhi wasallam said:You should never be envious of an evil-doer (an infidel or a pervert) because of a blessing or prosperity. You do not know what suffering he is going to endure after death. At Allah’s place (i.e., in the Hereafter) there is a killer for him that will not die.

The narrator, Abdullah ibne Abi Maryam who related it, on the authority of AbuÊHurayrah radhiyallahu anhu says, “By ‘killer’, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam meant the Fire of Hell (ie. the evil-doer is going to live in Hell forever. To be envious of such a man is rank foolishness and ignorance).”
(Baghawi)

Commentary
Often when a truthful Believer, who is spending his days in pain and poverty, sees some wicked and godless person surrounded with comfort and luxuries, the devil puts various doubts into his heart, or, at least, he begins to feel envious of his happy circumstances. But it is the height of ingratitude to Allah. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam, in this Tradition, has warned that no believing person should grudge the short-lived happiness and prosperity of those who are devoid of the blessings of faith and good-doing because, after all, they are going to undergo the torment of Fire in the Hereafter.

If the bitter end which is awaiting those unfortunate men can be known, material comfort and physical pleasures they are enjoying will appear to be no better than the special consideration that is shown to those who are sentenced to death a few days before their execution. This, exactly, is the nature of the prosperity and bodily enjoyment of the rebels against Allah in the sight of the bondsmen who are blessed with faith in the reality of the Hereafter, as related by the Apostles. They do not view with envy their wealth and comfort but are thankful to Allah that by endowing them with Faith He has saved them from the frightful chastisement that is in store for the impudent slaves of the flesh.

The humble writer has known faithful bondsmen who, on seeing godless men of the world, spontaneously recited the prayer of gratitude and thankfulness to the Lord the sacred Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam used to say when he saw anyone in distress: Praise be to the Lord who saved me from that with which He hath inflicted thee, and made be better than many of His creatures.

Related posts:

1. Auspiciousness of tears
2. Last Night of Ramadhaan
3. Hazrat Aisha (R.A)

The world is like a courtroom, with Allah as our judge. We are called upon to fulfill our covenant with Allah, who asked, “Am I not your Lord?” To which we answered, “Yea.” And since here on earth we are on trial, our every word and action form the witnesses to and the evidence of that agreement.
Mathnavi of Maulana Jalaluddin Rumi

Related posts:

1. The reality of this world
2. What is in your heart?
3. Shaykh Shah Jalal

UK: Imams helping Muslim gays get religious recognition

Via BBC:

Some British Asian gay Muslims are embracing a new identity, based as much on race and religion as on sexual orientation with a number trying to do it with the help of their local imams.

When Khalid Habib decided it was time to come out about his sexuality, the first person he chose to confide in was not anyone in the family but his local imam.

“It was really important to me because I am a practising Muslim. It was about my personal relationship with Allah,” said the 35-year-old media professional from the north of England.

This article was prepared by the Islam in Europe blog – islamineurope.blogspot.com

“I sat in his sitting room struggling to get the words,” he said.

“I told him I have issues, but couldn’t bring myself to utter the words ‘with my sexuality’. We spent many hours sitting in silence,” he recalled

When Khalid finally told him, he was struck by the imam’s reaction.

“He was really honest. He told me that in his 25 years of experience as a leader in a British Muslim community, he had never thought about homosexuality in a practical sense.

“So, he had approached it in the textbook sense, preaching that it was immoral, wrong and ‘haram’ in Islam. But he had never looked at it in a human sense.”

(…)

Asif Qureshi, a key worker at The Naz Project, a London-based support group working with British Asian gay men said: “In my experience, the number of Asian gays coming out has almost tripled over the last three years.”

In fact, there is some evidence to suggest that those who dare to come out and seek long term same-sex relationships are sometimes not content with the idea of civil partnerships.

They desire religious recognition of their union, with some reportedly taking the daring step of entering into nikkahs (Muslim marriage contracts).

Mr Qureshi said he was aware of couples who had opted for such nikkahs but stressed that these were performed by imams in absolute secrecy.

Muslim gay activist Ibrahim Ismail has been working on sexual health issues for many years.

He said: “Some of their families and friends may even attend these nikkahs, but they would never publicly admit it for fear of being ostracised by mainstream Muslims.

Even though it is something entirely covert, the idea of Muslim gay marriages sheds light on the role some imams could be playing in helping people reconcile their sexuality and their faith.

As Khalid Habib said, when he came out to his imam three years ago, little did he know that this would be the beginning of a long process to come to terms with sometimes uncomfortable aspects of his faith.

He said, since then, he’s been engaged in an ongoing dialogue with three separate imams to discuss what Allah would have to say about various aspects of his lifestyle.

“It has been a difficult but a mutually rewarding process.

“At least I have found an imam who has agreed to perform my nikkah when I get married,” he said with a smile as he discussed his plans of having a traditional South Asian wedding one day.

(more)

| Part 1 |Part 2 |Part 3 |Part 4|Part 5|

“Remember that there is much good in bearing with patience that which you dislike, and that victory comes with patience, and that with hardship comes a way out and with difficulty comes ease.” (Ahmad).

Golden words of advice spoken to Ibn ‘Abbas by the Messenger of Allah (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam). In the story of Ka’b bin Malik (radhiAllahu anhu) and those who stayed behind is a reflection of the truthfulness of these words.

40 painful days of isolation have passed. Ka’b bin Malik (radhiAllahu anhu) and the two companions await a response, a sign of relief. Divine revelation had ceased to descend upon the Prophet (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam), by Allah’s wisdom, just as He delayed it in the incident of the slander of Aisha (radhiAllahu anha).  But the Prophet (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam) now has a message for Ka’b and his companions. A messenger was sent. Had he come with tidings of relief? Were the Muslims were permitted to speak to them?

When forty out of the fifty nights elapsed, behold! There came to me the messenger of Allah’s Apostle and said, ‘Allah’s Apostle orders you to keep away from your wife,’

I said, ‘Should I divorce her; or else! what should I do?’ He said, ‘No, only keep aloof from her and do not cohabit her.’ The Prophet sent the same message to my two fellows. Then I said to my wife. ‘Go to your parents and remain with them till Allah gives His Verdict in this matter.’

The trial is bitter, with seemingly no signs of a sweet end. Yet Ka’b responds with words showing his ardent desire to ensure compliance with the order of the Messenger of Allah (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam).  If he was told that he must divorce her, he would have done so immediately without delay.

Here we notice exemplary manners from the Companions in dealing with the commands of the Prophet (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam). The messenger who came to Ka’b did not reply with extra words beyond those conveyed to him by the Prophet (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam). He did not say ‘I think he meant this (to divorce) or I think he meant not to divorce.’ He repeated the previous command without further interpretation.  Ka’b also complied immediately and refused to ask for flexibility, even when others told him to seek it:

Kab added, “The wife of Hilal bin Umaiya came to Apostle and said, ‘O Allah’s Apostle! Hilal bin Umaiya is a helpless old man who has no servant to attend on him. Do you dislike that I should serve him? ‘ He said, ‘No (you can serve him) but he should not come near you.’ She said, ‘By Allah, he has no desire for anything. By, Allah, he has never ceased weeping since his case began till this day of his.’

In testing His slaves, Allah is Merciful. From His mercy upon them was that this command came towards the last days of the test, perhaps they would not have been able to remain patient had it come earlier on. Through this,  is a reminder to console ourselves in testing times by pondering over the mercy of Allah, that He did not allow the test to be worse.

The Prophet (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam) was also merciful to his ummah. Even though the matter was serious, he exempted Hilal bin Umaiya by allowing his wife to serve her elderly husband.

On that, some of my family members said to me, ‘Will you also ask Allah’s Apostle to permit your wife (to serve you) as he has permitted the wife of Hilal bin Umaiya to serve him?’ I said, ‘By Allah, I will not ask the permission of Allah’s Apostle regarding her, for I do not know what Allah’s Apostle would say if I asked him to permit her (to serve me) while I am a young man.’

Then I remained in that state for ten more nights after that till the period of fifty nights was completed starting from the time when Allah’s Apostle prohibited the people from talking to us.

Separating a man from his wife, a hefty matter, only emphasized that this was indeed a great trial. But, Ibn Al-Qayyim (rahimahullah) in his book Zad Al-Ma’aad, points out that the command to avoid their wives, was in fact a sign of closely approaching good in two ways.

First, the messenger sent by the Prophet (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam) was considered a type of ‘speaking’ with them, after he had completely avoided them, even through an intermediary.

Second, the specific command for them to avoid their wives served as a reminder for them to abandon any means of pleasure and increase in worship. When worship is increased, this signals that the period of test or punishment is almost over. Related to this is the last ten nights of Ramadan, when the Prophet (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam) set an example of avoiding his wives and heavily increasing worship, before the month reaches its end.

So as signs of the end of this trial begin to appear, for every afflicted believer, there are also tidings of hope.  When you are overcome by distress, worry, and debts or when backs are turned to you and a genuine smile can no longer spread across your face due to the grief shadowing your days, think of Ka’b (radhiAllahu anhu). Remember now that it is a sign from Allah, that the time has come to turn to none but Him, subhanahu wata’ala.

“And who is better in religion than one who submits himself to Allah.” (al-Nisaa’ 4:125)

This is the purpose of your trial; that you are freed from arrogance, pride and cured of the hardened heart that comes with a state of ongoing ease and prosperity.

The goal is to repent to Allah and flee to Him, so that your heart is attached to Him like never before. Ka’b bin Malik had no one to complain to but Allah. Refrain from complaining to the creation, who cannot relieve you of your agony.  In fact, we should be shy from Allah, that He sees us asking and hoping in other than Him. Ka’b never gave up hope in Allah when everyone turned away. To give up hope in your Creator and Sustainer is to hold poor thoughts of Him, subhanahu wata’ala. How is it that we fail to place our trust in Him, when He is more Merciful to us than our own selves?

In the hands of the people, you will not find honor or even disgrace. When you keep asking of them, they increase in annoyance. As for Allah, when you ask Him, He is more pleased.  Allah loves to hear his slaves invoking, begging and asking from Him Alone.

“Is He [not best] who responds to the desperate one when he calls upon Him and removes evil.” (al-Naml 27:62)

Reflect on the example of Prophet Ayyub (alayhe asallam) who, in a state of affliction in wealth, children and health, called out to Allah:

And [mention] Job, when he called to his Lord, “Indeed, adversity has touched me, and you are the Most Merciful of the merciful.”

So We responded to him and removed what afflicted him of adversity. And We gave him [back] his family and the like thereof with them as mercy from Us and a reminder for the worshippers [of Allah]. (al-Anbiyaa’ 21:83,84)

Allah ends off the example of this Prophet by describing it as  ذِكْرَىٰ لِلْعَابِدِينَ : ‘A reminder for all those who worship Us.’

On these words, Ibn Kathir comments: “We made him an example lest those who are beset by trials think that We do that to them because We do not care for them, so that they may take him as an example of patience in accepting the decrees of Allah and bearing the trials with which He tests His servants as He will.’ (Tafsir Ibn Kathir)

When you turn to Allah in supplication, be sure of a response. If it is delayed, He will compensate you by filling your heart with patience and certainty, both of which are sources of reward, until invoking Him carries a sweetness of its own. A delayed response makes the believer blame none but himself, hence leading to repentance. Once we humble ourselves, seeking forgiveness, admitting that indeed we are undeserving due to our sins, Allah will forgive and bring forth relief.

It is not the calamity that has narrowed our life, rather falling in the trap of the incapable ones is what restricts us. The Prophet (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam) said: “The most incapable person is the one who does not make du`a.” (Sahih Al-Jami’)

The heart of the believer is pulled towards its Lord in times of hardship, unlike those hearts numbed from sensing the alarm that awakens the living hearts.  Every test is a key with which we unlock our hearts. Allah (subhanahu wata’ala) says,

“Then why, when Our punishment came to them, did they not humble themselves? But their hearts became hardened.” (al-An’aam 6:43)

Abu Sa’id Al-Khudri narrated: One day the Messenger of Allah (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam) entered the mosque. He saw there a man from the Ansar called Abu Umamah and said to him: “What is the matter that I am seeing you sitting in the mosque when there is no time of prayer?”

Abu Umamah said: “I am entangled in sorrow and debts.”

The Prophet (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam) replied: “Shall I not teach you words by which, when you say them, Allah will remove your sorrow, and settle your debts?”

Abu Umamah said: “Yes, Messenger of Allah”

The Prophet (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam) said: “Say in the morning and evening:

Allaahumma inni a’oodhu bika min al-hamm wa’l-hazn wa’l-‘ajz wa’l-kasal wa’l-bukhl wa’l-jubn wa dala’ al-dayn wa ghalbat al-rijaal

“O Allah! I seek refuge with You from worry and grief, from incapacity and laziness, from cowardice and miserliness, from being heavily in debt and from being overpowered by (other) men.”

Abu Umamah said: “When I did that Allah removed my distress and settled my debt.” (Abu Dawud).

When Abu Umamah faced hardship, he fled to Allah, Who aided him with the du’aa that the Prophet (sallaAllahu alayhe wasallam) taught him, thus relieving his distress.

Finally, after you plead to your Creator, seeking a way out of the darkness, recall the example of Prophet  Zakariya (alayhe asallam) who upheld righteous deeds whilst invoking Allah for offspring.  When the angels came to grant him glad tidings of a son, Yahya, they found him standing in the mihrab. Istiqamah on the obedience of Allah, after du’aa is a cause of being blessed with a response, as opposed to heedlessness and displeasing Allah, after asking Him.

“So the angels called him while he was standing in prayer in the chamber, “Indeed, Allah gives you good tidings of John.” (Aal-‘Imran 3:39).

As for our beloved companion, Ka’b bin Malik (radhiAllahu anhu), a messenger came to him while he too was in a state of obedience, having just concluded the fajr prayer:

When I had offered the Fajr prayer on the 50th morning on the roof of one of our houses and while I was sitting in the condition which Allah described (in the Qur’an) i.e. my very soul seemed straitened to me and even the earth seemed narrow to me for all its spaciousness, there I heard the voice of one who had ascended the mountain of Sala’ calling with his loudest voice, ‘O Kab bin Malik! Be happy (by receiving good tidings).’ I fell down in prostration before Allah, realizing that relief has come.

Allah has spoken the Truth;

“For indeed, with hardship [will be] ease. Indeed, with hardship [will be] ease.” (al-Sharh 5,6).

Muslim Danish politician Naser Khader attacks Islam in harsh terms. He thinks many of the world’s biggest idiots are Muslims.

Naser Khader’s anger comes in the wake of the case of the 43 year old Iranian woman who was sentenced to death for adultery.

This article was prepared by the Islam in Europe blog – islamineurope.blogspot.com

The case got the Conservative integration spokesperson to write on Facebook that he’s considering leaving Islam.

“Yes, I just get so upset by it and frustrated that so many of the world’s biggest idiots are Muslims,” Naser Khader told bt.dk. (audio at link).

“Occasionally when something like this or terrorist attacks happen, I think that I don’t want to be their coreligionist. I’m not leaving Islam, but I just get frustrated that people can kill in the name of Allah. For example, the hostages that are taken in Iraq, their throats are slit, and they say God is great.”

Naser Khader wrote the following on Facebook:

“Why must she die? It is something that sometimes makes me consider leaving Islam. I don’t want to be a coreligionist of these barbarian, women-oppressing executioners.”

Source: bt.dk (Danish)

7.1 WEDDINGS ARE PART OF THE PROPHET’S TRADITION
If invited to a marriage ceremony or wedding celebration, you should accept the invitation unless it may include prohibited acts. Attending a wedding is part of the Sunnah, as Islam regards marriage as an act of worship and obedience to Allah. Islam endorses performing marriage contracts in the mosque. Muslim jurists stipulated that this is based on a Hadith reported by Al-Tirmidhi and Ibn Maja: ‘Publicize the marriage, execute it at the mosques and celebrate it with drums.’ Another Hadith reported by Imam Ahmad and Al-Hakim and others supports the first Hadith: ‘Publicize Marriage.’ It also supported by a third Hadith reported by Ahmad, Al-Tirmidhi, Al-Nasa’i and Ibn Maja: ‘The difference between a legitimate (Halal) and an illegitimate (Haram) marriage is the presence of voices and drums.’

There is no dispute among Muslim scholars that in a wedding celebration, the Prophet (PBUH) allowed women to use drums. The most valid opinion among many scholars is that men can also use drums in order to publicize the marriage thus making it known near and far. The noble Islamic purpose of such publicity is to distinguish between an evil and illicit relationship and a pure and desirable marriage.

Attending a wedding is one of the rights of brotherhood among Muslims. It fulfills the requirement of publicity, reinforces the need to attest to the sanctity of the marriage, and it gives a chance to join your brethren as they complete the second half of Islam, and while you pray that they remain observant of the first half. Attending a wedding also honours the husband and wife by having their relatives and friends share in their happiness. It blesses them with guests that pray to Allah for their righteousness, success, affluence and prosperity.

7.2 THE MANNERS OF ATTENDING WEDDINGS
If invited, attend the celebration as if you have answered an invitation to a blessed occasion, and a delightful and acclaimed celebration, as the Prophet proclaimed you should. Dress appropriately, for the Prophet’s companions used to dress properly at weddings. When initiating or sharing in discussions, make sure your conversation fits the happy occasion and does not include depressing and distasteful subject matter that could spoil the occasion. Muslims should be wise and considerate.

It is recommended that you congratulate the bride and bridegroom, by reciting the Hadith narrated by Abu Dawood and Al-Tirmidhi, and authenticated by Ibn Maja and Al-Hakim, whereby the Prophet (PBUH) said: ‘May Allah bless your side and bless your counterpart and may Allah tie your union with virtue.’ Do not use the commonly used phrase ‘With comfort and children,’ because this was the phrase used by the people of ignorance (Jahilia). The Prophet (PBUH) prohibited such a saying, and Allah, with His blessing, replaced it by the prayer of his Prophet (PBUH). Al-Bukhari reported that ‘Ayisha (RA) said: ‘When the Prophet (PBUH) married me, my mother led me into the house where women of Ansar were celebrating. They congratulated me with reward, blessing, and ‘best of luck’ wishes.

Islam permits women to celebrate a wedding by singing tasteful songs, accompanied by a drum beat. Such poems and songs should not promote lust, lewd desire, or portray physical beauty. Instead, they should sing delightful and decent songs to express their happiness with the marriage. Al-Bukhari reported that ‘Ayisha (RA) said: ‘A bride was led to her Ansar husband. The Prophet (PBUH) said: O Ayisha, did you not have merriment? The Ansar love fun.’ He was referring to the singing and beating of drums.

Al-Hafiz ibn Hajar reported in his book Fath Al-Bari that ‘Ayisha recalled that the Prophet (PBUH) asked ‘Why did you not send with her [the bride] a singer girl to sing with a drum beat? I said, ‘What?’ He answered:

We are visiting you, we are visiting you
If you greet us, we’ll greet you.
For your gold, bright and red, brought the bride to your farm
And it is your wheat, brown and tanned, that made your virgins’ charm

Songs sung at weddings must be similar and have wholesome and seemly meanings. Songs of lust, passion and immorality should be avoided.

from the book ISLAMIC MANNERS
By Shaykh Abdul-Fattaah Abu Ghuddah (RA)

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